Monday, February 28, 2011

Peddling My Wears

The Boat, Fishing, and Leisure show recently wrapped up in our fair city of Antler River. I just love these shows filled with various exhibitors who are trying to get you to buy their products. Of course, they charge admission. I mean, it's only right that we should pay to watch someone peddle their own wares. It's like how people pay good money to wear an article of clothing that is boldly emblazoned with a corporate logo.

Business people aren't stupid. They know that the public will do the advertising for them. The boat show charges $10 a head. Even those who have little or no income are expected to hand over some jack. Seniors and children can fork out $8 and $5 respectively. Children under 6 are not charged admission since they cannot grasp the concept of free enterprise. They think the world and everyone in it should cater to them. They're all in for a rude awakening once they've lived a year past their fifth birthday.

An interesting item that was pitched at this year's show was the Firebuoy. This is a floating lightweight aluminum fire pit! You can have a barbecue or campfire right on the water! I don't know about you, but every single time I'm boating, or canoeing, or swimming, or even sitting in a hot tub, I think. "Gee-whiz. Why can't I have a barbecue or a campfire right here, right now?"

Everybody sing: "Smoke on the water... "

Incidentally, do they pronounce it Fire-boo-ee or Fire-boy? Personally, I like the pronunciation that rhymes with gooey. When someone pronounces it "boo-ee", then I'm certain as to what they're referring to. But if someone says there's a buoy out in the water (and pronounces it "boy"), then I'm likely to start running around looking for a life-boo-ee to throw to the boy who might not be very boo-ee-ant.

But back to the subject of advertising. I can see that publicity, promotion, and plugging is what my blog needs. I must get out there and beat the drum for my interests.

The Oscars were televised last night. If I'd had the foresight, business acumen, moxie, and moolah, then I might have flown out there and tried to convince one of the attendees to stroll down the red carpet with an official item of Snow Shoveling In Canada Evening Wear ®.

As well — being the author of such a noteworthy blog — I could probably have obtained a press pass and interviewed a few of the celebrities. I've heard some of those interviews. The hard-hitting attack style of questioning demonstrated by Mike Wallace is not required. You just need a microphone and the right amount of smarm.

Maybe next year. Oh buoy, I can hardly wait!


  1. Love your humour. I was also at the Boat Fishing & Leisure Show in Antler River and saw the Firebuoy on display. Although I didn't buy it, I did leave the building $150 poorer than when I went in. So...sure! I'll but your t-shirt. I'm an easy sell.

  2. Dear Kara,

    Thank you for your comments and for your interest in the official Snow Shoveling In Canada Sportswear ®. Once enough interest is generated, I’ll start production and begin accepting orders (but don’t hold your breath). As well, on behalf of all Antler Riverers, I mean Riverians, uh Riverites, that is to say River people, I would like to thank you for your commerce at the boat show. For my part, I didn’t buy a darned thing. I’m waiting and hoping that next year they’ll come out with the Firesled. Although similar to the Firebuoy, this would be a winter device that sits on your driveway or walkways. You just ignite it and it melts away the snow.

    BTW, I really like your blog.

  3. I came back here a couple of times but I see you haven't posted anything lately... Are you going to post some more?

  4. Thank you for your comments. We at Snow Shoveling In Canada have been on a brief hiatus due to the recent heat wave. It's expected to hit 36 degrees Celsius, which is hot enough to fry an egg on your Firebouy. This scorching weather is enough to make you feel as if all that snow shoveling was just a dream. As well, the entire staff of SSIC (which would be moi) is in the process of moving from Antler River to its new headquarters in Minikin Ontario.

    As soon as the heat and smoke clear, and hopefully before the first snowfake falls, we will post some more of the august journalism our readers have become used to.

    Perhaps sometime in August.