Tuesday, February 23, 2010

SSIC's Answer Man

Here is an actual question from Answers.com:

Q. Are there any words starting with p that deal with the revolutionary war?

The editors here at Snow Shoveling in Canada have done a little research and can provide this answer:

A. Oddly enough, there has never been a single word starting with p that has been used in any description, account, story (fact or fiction), or historical document that has dealt with the American Revolutionary War. The olitical differences between the revolutionaries (George Washington, Aul Revere and other atriots among that group) and the arliament of Great Britain (including its Rime Minister) brought about this colossal conflict. From Massachusetts to New York to Hiladelphia and everywhere between, you will find nothing starting with a p.

I know it’s hard to believe. I thought everybody knew that there were no p words dealing with the Revolutionary War. But there you have it.

Here are some more interesting questions that require some expert answering expertise:

Q. How do you spell rinocerus rhinoseros rhinosoros rihnocerous oh, the hell with it.

A. I believe the word you’re looking for is rhinosaurus; a great lizard of the sebaceous period. This fearsome giant is the ancestor to our modern day horned hippoplatypus.

Q. Is Mike Tyson a hero?

In a 1997 boxing match, Mike Tyson bit off part of Evander Holyfield's ear and spat it out onto the canvas. In 2010, Evander Holyfield, during an argument with his wife, said she needed to 'start putting God first'. The argument had something to do with payments made (or not made) to their church. The former heavyweight champion reacted by hitting his wife in the face. Had these two events happened in reverse chronological order, then Mr. Tyson might very well be considered a hero.

Q. Who stole the kishka?

A. Since a Wikipedia article describes kishka in part as “a blood sausage made with pig's blood and buckwheat or barley, with pig's intestines used as a casing…” then I have no idea who in their right mind would think this an item worth pilfering. I suggest you consult your local constabulary. They may want to check some emergency rooms for any recent admits with gastrointestinal distress.

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